A Year of Fun!

HBSledgehammer hit some milestones recently, coming up on the first birthday of this blog.

The breech birth of this collection of nonsense and common sense was the result of a deep disdain for Corporate Social Media, the assholes that run it, and the people that use it as a propaganda platform.

15,000+ Unique Visitors and 50,000+views.

People actually read this shit.

A few may even enjoy it…


The Speech codes, the disingenuous thuggery of those who cant  handle different opinions, and the ignorant fools that envisioned themselves as sages of wisdom, brought this mutant platform for fun and old fashioned ass kicking…screaming into the world, bloody, and slimy.

When presented to the proud father, he remarked, ” Thats an ugly fucking baby… but it’s mine and I will love it unconditionally.”

The afterbirth has been as disgusting as expected… but if you don’t like it, just turn your head and don’t look.

Sooner or later it winds up in the waste bin, if it’s not eaten by the proud parents. (Yeah..that’s a thing….)

Thanks to all of our readers and supporters.

People that realize that words…. are just that. Words.

I’m not writing any political shit for a while.

I just need a break from all the stupidity…

Elections are looming fast… you all know I can’t stay out of that fray…LOL


Slate Mailer from Hell?  You know its coming…

Back after a while…




Live Life.

I started this blog a year ago.   The June 2017 Posts were all experimental and were deleted.

I’m going to go on a much needed hiatus.

I can write all I need to in my notebooks, when the urge strikes and until I’m ready to fire this thing back up.

It’s always here when I want to get a point across…

As for now, there are far more important things in life to deal with then the usual cast of characters  that seem to fill these pages.

Back soon…

Go live your life…

CKJ 6/7/18


A True Debt of Gratitude…

Every OVSD voter owes a huge debt of gratitude to 47th district Republican Congressional candidate, David Clifford. clifford

Clifford lost his primary race against carpetbagging John F. Briscoe, who pulled every ratty campaign sign he ever paid for out of his storage facility and plastered them all over a Congressional District he dosent even live in.

Clifford and I shared a good laugh, as it appeared as though some of Briscoes campaign signs had been fabricated in the Vietnam war era, and were dirty and bent to shit.

Unfortunately, many uniformed voters cast their votes for the guy with the most signs or glossiest mailers…

If any of these “Low Information” voters had bothered to investigate Briscoe, they would have arrived at the same opinion as me….that this man is an unqualified loon, unfit for ANY office, let alone a Congressional one.

Clifford did fantastic in his rookie outing, garnering the endorsements of both the LA and OC County GOP…the same ones that avoided Briscoe like that smelly bum that sits down next to you on a bus, causing you to get up and move to avoid his insane ramblings and noticeable stench.

The utter irony in all this?

Although we lost an opportunity to field a solid candidate against Lowenthal in the 47th, we gained something good in the process.

Since Briscoe is now running in the Congressional General Election, he cannot run for OVSD again.

That seat will now open up for a true conservative.

And Briscoe will he embarrassingly trounced by Lowenthal come November.

Which means….Briscoe is finished politically.

As he should be.

This man isn’t qualified to run for dog catcher, let alone congress.

Clifford, on the other hand,has a bright future in the coming years,as he learns the ropes and continues to garner support for his next run.

To the Republicans in the 47th, I don’t say you need to vote for Lowenthal. When you hit that spot on your ballot, just keep going, and leave it blank.

Don’t reward Briscoe with even one vote.

Push him out the political door forever, where he belongs.

And to anybody that endorses Briscoe in this race, I have a long memory. To endorse this asshat simply because he is the “Republican” in the race, I not much different than endorsing Alfred E. Newman because their is an R next to his name.

alfred and John

Consider this fair warning.

The Pool. A tale of suburban nirvana.

The saga of ” The Pool” began innocently enough, while attending Mass with my wife and children.

It ended two years short years later, as I sent a large pile of vinyl, metal & plastic to the landfill. A massive pile, that will remain for thousands of years.

For a brief period in between, I achieved suburban backyard nirvana.

This is the story of “The Pool”.


“Some brief announcements.
This Saturday, is the first Saturday of the month. Please join us by attending the 8:00 a.m. Mass, followed by a Holy Hour of praying the Rosary, meditation, prayers and songs in honor of Our Lady of Fatima.”

“It will begin right after the first Saturday Devotion. Please come and show your love and honor to our Holy Mother. Everyone is welcome.”

“And finally, if there is a parish family that is interested in an above ground pool, complete with filtration and accessories, please see Monsignor Perez after mass.”

“Missa est. Deo Gratias.”

I could feel the eyes of my wife and children burning laser hot on my skin.


“But Dad…..”

“No Pool.” ( Interior voice… No fucking way!)

“Pu h-leese? It’s free dad!”

“No.” ( Interior voice…Absolutely, no fucking way!)

As with most things, I lost the battle after massive guilt tripping by my wife and kids…”How could you turn down a “Free” pool? “Puhlessseeeeeeee dad?”

So off to Anaheim we went the following day, to inspect and begin the process of disassembly of what would be know only as “the (*fucking) Pool”. (* Only expressed internally…)

It took me 2 full days to drain and dismantle this behemoth … a 15 x 20 above ground pool, complete with a giant sand filter and monster pump, a ladder and all the accessories…net. pole, test kit…etc. 8,000 gallons of pure suburban nirvana.

The components of the pool were transported back to my home, in multiple trips to Anaheim, in the back of a mini van, and deposited on the side of my house to await reconstruction.

And wait, it did.

I was in no hurry to put this thing in…

The pressure began to mount sometime in late spring, with the realization that the weather would be warming and the pool would be nice to swim in during the summer.

“Dad…when are you going to build the pool?”, became a daily mantra from my kids and my wife.

Sometime in May, I did the research required to figure out how to erect this thing, and found out that it was a major mechanical engineering challenge.

Somehow, I failed to realize that I was dealing with 8,000 gallons… fully 64,000 lbs of water. Water that would potentially come pouring into my house with no warning, if I somehow fucked up the reconstruction.

Of course, I ignored the requirements to pull a permit from the City to erect such a structure. As far as I was concerned, it was merely a tax on my backyard nirvana.

The realization soon set in that I would be unable to install the side supports on one side ( The ones that held back those thousands of gallons of water…) without blowing a 10′ x 10′ hole in my patio. So I did.

I spent another day smoothing and screeding the soil, removing every last rock and dealing with the worlds largest nest of Jerusalem crickets, other wise known as “Potato bugs”. At one point I had no less than 40 of these disgusting creatures squirming in a 5 gallon bucket.


I then set about reassembling the pool from memory and a handy guide I downloaded from the manufacturer. After a full day of reconstruction and set up, The pool was now ready to be filled with water. I put a garden hose in it, turned it up full blast and went to bed.

I was overjoyed to find the pool full the next morning. I was NOT overjoyed… to see that it was leaking. Apparently in many places.

So I drained it. That took another day. I looked at the entire surface of the liner… every square inch… and patched what must have been the culprit holes. I then tossed the hose back in and began filling it up again. In the middle of a drought.

Once full again, it was apparent that I had missed a few holes. Donning swim fins, a scuba mask and snorkel, I dove down with a bottle of blue food coloring and shot it towards the suspect areas. The food coloring soon found its way to the remaining holes, which I patched with some “Underwater ” patches.

I was beginning to feel like Mike Nelson from Sea Hunt.


Once the pool was patched, of course, my children demanded to swim in it immediately. I had to tell them no, because the filtration system was still not hooked up and the water chemistry was not right. They walked back in the house dejected and scowling, carrying their towels and impromptu pool toys.


I set about setting up the sand filter. I filled it with sand , hooked up the pump and let it rip. Within minutes, my clean pool was filled with a fine layer of sand that was ejected from the jet right back into the pool. Fail.

I then learned how to reverse the filter and suck up all the sand.

Until I noticed a leak in the sand filter.

I shut down the sand filter and disassembled it. I noticed a small crack in one of the fittings and decided to Mcgyver the repair with two part epoxy.

” Can we go in the pool now?” “Can we”?

“No”. Its not ready”. More dejected looks and much grumbling.

After waiting a couple hours fro he epoxy to set, I fired it all up again and….

Houston, we have a pool! Albeit, an above ground pool… a symbol of wanna be neer’ do wells everywhere!… but… a pool it was.

I checked the chemistry of the pool, loaded it up with the proscribed amount of chlorine, and told the kids to wait a few hours, lest they die of poison gas attack.

At approx 5 in the afternoon on an early June weekend… our backyard Nirvana was finally achieved. All three kids jumped in, along with assorted boogie boards, surfboards, noodles, balls, goggles and swim fins, cats and dogs.

The fun continued long into the evening.

I then began my career as a chemistry major, monitoring the PH, alkalinity, chlorine levels etc. and running off to Home Depot constantly to buy PH Up, PH down, test kits , chlorine, muriatic acid …all I was missing was the lab coat.

In early July, there was a random late afternoon thundershower. I thought nothing of it until I woke the next day to find the pool a bright shade of green. I then spent the next two weeks trying unsuccessfully to restore my pool to its former pristine glory. After much effort, the pool was finally back in stasis for approximately 2 weeks before I could not keep it properly chlorinated and had to then kick everybody out again for a few days.

Near the end of Summer, the pinnacle of suburban backyard nirvana was achieved as I grilled hamburgers in the backyard while my kids played in the pool.

Summer was quickly followed by fall,and the pool was deemed to cold to swim in.

I decided to drain it and ride out the winter.


With the vinyl liner exposed to the elements, it became brittle. It began to tear in key points, and I realized that I was now on the hook for a new 400 dollar liner if the pool was to be put back into service for the next summer.

The pool then became a collection point for rainwater and a breeding ground for mosquitoes, despite my efforts to drain it.

Orange County Vector Control flew a drone over my home and sent me stern warning to get my shit together… “Or else”… or something like that.

With the decision to renovate our home made, It was decided that he pool would have to go. It took up most of the backyard and was actually a pain in the ass. Once we began prepping for the remodel, a 20 foot blue Rainbow roll-off became the final resting place for the pool. It took Sawzalls, wrenches, hammers, utility knives and shovels half the time to dismantle the pool than it did for me to carefully assemble it the summer before.

I dragged it piece by piece into the dumpster and bid a good riddance, as the pool disappeared down the street, on the back of a disposal Roll Off Hauler…


It now resides in a landfill, somewhere.

I know not where. But thousands of years from now, archeologists will stumble across it and will never know the fun we had as we achieved suburban nirvana for that one summer.

A representaive from OC Vector control stopped by yesterday, no doubt to cite me for my mosquito factory. One of my contractors showed him to the backyard, where he saw the large U shaped break in my patio and remarked… ” It’s Gone”.

Yep. It’s gone. Sometimes free… isn’t quite so free. Beware of Priests with Pools.

The Tarvin Files.

Gina Clayton- Tarvin went on a Kamikaze mission, to shut me up, with a perjury filled document, obviously prepared with the help of co- conspirators, in what is often referred to as a SLAPP suit. ( Strategic Lawsuit Against Public Participation).

She tried to dress it up in an ill fitting suit of victim-hood and lies, per her usual modus operandi.

On May 9th, 2018, I appeared in court to defend an attempt by Gina Clayton-Tarvin to obtain a permanent restraining order against me for a variety of charges, many of which had to have been provided to her by co-conspirators, due to the fact that Clayton-Tarvin had me “Blocked” on Facebook and would be unable to see my commentary.

Tarvin also filed a companion suit, alleging “Harassment”, “Libel per se”, & “Intentional infliction of emotional distress”.

Some of her “Charges” of “Threats” in the TRO were beyond ridiculous, and blatantly amounted to identifiable perjury. Her initial filing was filled with intentionally crafted inflammatory language, designed to obtain the desired result, which was a Temporary Restraining Order.

In one instance, she went so far as to scrape a comment from a Facebook conversation between myself and 2 friends,and frame it as a “threat” against her.

The level of disingenuous evil was on full display, and easy to identify.

She attempted to rush me into court with little time to prepare.

I complied with all of the requirements of the TRO, including surrendering my firearms to he HBPD for temporary storage pending the outcome of the hearing.

Tarvin called all of the media outlets and crony journalists that she has on speed dial, to trumpet the fact that she had obtained a TRO.

Most people fail to realize that the defendant. in an attempt to obtain a TRO has no chance to rebut the claims until the hearing date.

The Judge is always forced to err on the side of caution, and since Tarvin’s intentionally inflammatory claims painted me as a psychotic madman, Judge Timothy Stafford granted Tarvin’s request for a TRO.

It’s kind of sad that our justice system has a mechanism for people to remove 1st and 2nd amendment rights without due process, for even a short period, while the defendant awaits his or her hearing date, but it is what is.

I suppose it’s always better to err on the side of caution, so I bear no malice against the Judge, who was hoodwinked into granting the TRO, one which Tarvin promptly used as a media device to paint herself as a terrified “Victim” ,

And one which was promptly reported on by her hack for hire journalist friends, such as Gabriel San Roman at the OCWeakly and Priscilla Vega of the LA Times/ Daily Pilot and Alma Fausto of the OCRegister. ( I was surprised that they did not hand the piece to Tarvin’s Lapdog, Greg Mellen.)

Since I am not stupid enough to walk into combat without ammunition, body armor and reinforcements , I requested and was granted a continuance from the original April 18 Hearing date to May 9th, 2018.

I was able to study the filing in depth and rebut it so that my attorney could comprehend what seemed a bizarre case to begin with, and begin formulating a solid beatdown to the insane claims presented in Tarvin’s filing.

On May 9th, I prevailed in this sad, pathetic episode, and the Judge denied Tarvin’s request.

The following morning, she withdrew her Civil harassment case. That was probably a wise move, because it was so weak, that her attorneys must have confronted her afterwards and advised her that they would refuse to represent her, probably fearing sanctions from the Judge for a ” false filing” which would subject them to penalties from the Courts.

Either that, or Tarvin simply realized that the jig was up, and that she would get legally annihilated by my attorneys and myself, and be on the hook for thousands more dollars.

I was actually surprised to see her pull the suit so fast, since Tarvin is so arrogant and believes that she is somehow anointed, that I was convinced she would be willing to enter the Colosseum for another Gladiator show, one that would result in a quick and brutal loss to the pathological liar that is Gina Clayton- Tarvin.

Find below the documents related to this case. I will list them chronologically by name and purpose.

Tarvin’s Initial filing of a civil suit, unredacted:

Summons and complaint – Tarvin vs. Johnson

Tarvins Filing for a Temporary Restraining Order, unredacted;

TRO – Filing Tarvin Vs. Johnson

I complied with the Courts demand that I surrender my firearms until the hearing date, and filed a ch800 form with the courts, losing my second amendment rights to a perjury filled sworn declaration by Tarvin.

Property Reciept – Firearms- HBPD

The TRO Hearing date allowed me little time to prepare a response so I filed for a continuance:

Tarvin Vs. Johnson – Continuance

My attorney asked me to rebut the filing. The Filing consists of a series of Amendments at the end of Tarvins TRO filing. Find Below my analysis and rebuttal for review by my legal counsel in order of response to the amendments. Every word I say, is absolutely true. These were prepared by myself in order to provide the context and truth to my counsel.

These documents….represent the absolute truth of the case. I challenge anybody to demonstrate otherwise.

Rebuttal to attachment 3b

Rebuttal to attachment 4

Rebuttal to 7a and 7b

Rebuttal to 7a 4 and 5

Proof of any claims in these rebuttals is available upon request. Also, if you care to challenge what I assert…..

email me at : surfcitysledgehammer@gmail.com

We filed CPRA Requests with the City of Huntington Beach Police Department.

2018-04-17.PRA Request to City of HB Copy

We finally obtained the following documents in return, indicating Tarvin knew full well, that her charges were not deemed credible threats. She even tried to use a joke that I wrote to Mayor Mike Posey, who was visiting John Moorloch, asking him not to consider endorsing lunatic John Briscoe, as if that had anything to do with anything…


My attorney began crafting our formal response, which was submitted to the court.

Response to Request for Restraining Order

My attorney also prepared an Anti Slapp filing, and submitted it to the courts, which will be heard by Judge Timothy Stafford in June…. The same Judge Tarvin Called “Reckless” after her beatdown. Thanks Gina!

No doubt Stafford will take that comment into account when he decides whether or not to whack you over the head for thousands more in legal fees in June 2018, dumb ass…

Tarvin Vs. Johnson Anti-SLAPP Motion

In a nutshell, The Judge realized Tarvin was a nutcase.

He blasted her attorneys for bringing a weak case to the court, and gave me a beatdown because… you know…”We should all be nice..” lol.

Verdict? Case Dismissed. Just as I knew it would be.

The Following day, Gina Clayton- Tarvin withdrew her even more ridiculous civil suit. Since I am preparing to leave to go out, I will return to finish this piece, with the breakdown of the civil suit, annihilated line by line, (Just so Gina Tarvin will know the level of damage she would have sustained, had her attorneys not told her to drop the case, either because they knew it was too weak or weaker than the TRO, or they, like many people, had grown sick of her lies, and were too embarrassed to represent such a head case, under threats of an Order To Show Cause why the civil “harassment” suit should not be dismissed out of hand for false filing, and both attorneys and client sanctioned and fined.

Nice Try Gina… better luck next time.

Your Participation Trophy is in the mail… and remember…

“It’s all for the kids…”


Ready when you are…

Excerpted from the New York Times…

“In 1988, the United States Supreme Court, in an 8-0 ruling, broadly reaffirmed and extended its rules protecting criticism of public figures as free speech, even if the criticism is ”outrageous” and offensive.

The Court overturned a jury’s $200,000 award to the Rev. Jerry Falwell for ”emotional distress” over a Hustler magazine parody that portrayed him as an incestuous drunk.

The decision was written in sweeping language by Chief Justice William H. Rehnquist, who has often taken a narrow view of the First Amendment’s protection of free speech. 

He said that ”graphic depictions and satirical cartoons have played a prominent role in public and political debate” throughout the nation’s history and that the First Amendment protects even ”vehement, caustic and sometimes unpleasantly sharp attacks.” 

Press groups and civil libertarians applauded the decision as a welcome protection for editorial cartoonists in particular and commentators in general.

The Court effectively shut off an effort to make it easier for public figures to muzzle criticism and satire.

Concern for freedom of speech has led the Court, in decisions beginning with New York Times Company v. Sullivan in 1964, to apply the ”actual malice” standard in suits by public officials and public figures seeking compensation for false statements that injure the plaintiff’s reputation. The decision today extends that standard to suits in which the injury alleged is not to reputation but to mental well-being.”

At HBSledgehammer.com, we vet everything that we publish.

Nothing false goes out.

We engage in satire and wide open criticism, of inept and unqualified public officials, in the public interest.

To those politicians that suffer from mental illnesses, such as Narcissistic Personality Disorder and Paranoia, and feel that any critical comment is “harassment”, Libel, slander etc…. I’ve got news for you.

Chief Justice Rehnquist held in 1988, that even ”speech that is patently offensive and is intended to inflict emotional injury” on public figures is protected by the First Amendment if it does not include false statements made without regard for whether they are false.

Don’t ever forget it. We don’t.

We are HBSledgehammer.com

And we stand in open defiance of anyone who would silence our voices.

Bring It on. We’re Ready….

CJ Ray Fundraiser at Mama's on 39…


Charles “CJ” Ray is a 2018 Candidate for Huntington Beach City Council.

I had the pleasure of sitting down with Ray a while back, and found him to be articulate, knowledgeable, sincere and most of all, qualified for a seat on the HB City Council. Ray  has lived his entire life in HB and cares deeply about his City.

He offers unique solutions to many of the problems we face as a city and manages to set himself apart from his competition. He is unaligned with any of the existing Republican factions in Huntington Beach and tends to go his own way.

Ray’s Grandfather, Don Watson, served with distinction as the HB City Treasurer from 1988 to 1996.

Ray was a hardcore Baseball player in his High School Years.

He graduated from Cal Poly Pomona with a Bachelors in Communications with a minor in Political Science. Ray then went on to obtain his Juris Doctorate from Trinity Law School, graduating with a Dean’s scholarship. 

Ray’s oratory abilities are off the charts. I can’t wait to watch him dismantle his competition in open debate during the 2018 Candidate Forums.

It will be priceless to watch…a true highlight of the 2018 campaign season…

I would like to encourage all HB Sledgehammer readers to come on out and attend Rays’s inaugural fundraiser and help him get off to a good start.

Unlike some other professed Republican candidates, he dosent have 50k in bitcoin lying around to self fund his campaign, although, as an successful attorney, I’m sure hes not hurting for scratch.

I plan on being in attendance. It might be a good chance for the HBSledgehammer Army to hold a private side meeting, to plot and scheme our plan for world domination.

Leave the Sledge T-shirts at home ladies!


We all know how problematic they can be…

See you all at Mama’s on 39, Wednesday, April 11th, 2018 from 5:30-7:30. And don’t forget to bring your wallet….

Click Here for CJ Ray’s Campaign website…

Postscript…since we usually end our posts with some pertinent music, I thought i would throw out this slab of heavy Scandanavian Metal for CJ Ray…who admitted hes a fan of some good distorted noise…just another reason to like him….


Now accepting applications.

Tired of all those homeless fuckers pissing in your bushes, stealing your bikes, smoking meth, leaving IV needles lying around, shitting in buckets and mouthing off about their rights? 

Tired of a  police chief that doesn’t do shit about the problem and mumbles lip service when cornered?

HBCPL is for you. 

Requirements: Ability to swing a bat, spark a road flare, shoot a paintball gun and throw rotten fruit a reasonable distance. Unpredictable large breed dogs a plus.

Current chapters: Downtown HB, South East HB and North HB.

Meetings are held at dive bars or in somebody’s man cave garage, all over town.

Just remember, if you run across this homeless chick, she can stay.

At least she productive…


Homeless Zombie Apocalypse.

With the release of the news yesterday that OC County supervisiors have voted to spread the joy of housing the incorrigible drug addicted, mentally ill, homeless zombies from the Santa Ana Riverbed to Huntington Beach, allow me to put the entire governmental structure of our city on notice.

If you refuse to stand up to this insane plan, I will declare war.

Think I’m joking?

We already have a Police Chief that treats these criminal miscreants as honored guests, to the detriment of all who have to tolerate the behavior of these people.

There was a time when Huntington Beach police made it clear to these folks that they were not welcome to take up residence anywhere they chose to and impose their lifestyle on peaceful, law abiding communities.

Old School policing might get you a one way trip to Stanton in the back of a squad car. That was if you were lucky. The alternative approach was a no bruise beat down behind a shopping center and a stern warning to get the fuck out of town….fast.

And don’t come back.

If this situation is allowed to stand, I predict open vigilante warfare by the fed up residents of HB who, in the absence of any real police concern about the phenomenon, elect to take matters into their own hands.


This will quickly grow ugly and perhaps violent as the old school HB asskicking brigade emerges from decades of civility and takes to the streets to solve this problem in classic old school HB Fashion.


So lets get busy City Council. City Attorney Michael Gates. Police Chief Handy. This one is on you.

This is the time for action.